Buttercup Memories
It was the season of daisies, spring was in late bloom, and the warm breath of an anxious summer gave me an early morning hello. The sky was a gentle shade of springtime blue, and cotton candy clouds made their way to nowhere—a day I couldn’t resist being lazy. In search of a bit of inspiration, I grabbed my copy of, Selected Poems by Henry David Thoreau, and walked to the park
Washington Park, and the adjacent zoo, in my hometown of Michigan City, Indiana, is gorgeous this time of year. A gentle breeze blew across the clear calm of Lake Michigan, past the sculpted sands of a deserted beach, and ruffled my graying hair. In the distance, a lion welcomed in the day with a mighty roar—as macaws, peacocks, and ring tailed monkeys chimed in, not to be out done by this king of beast.
To my surprise, the park was all but empty except for a young mother who sat on a cool carpet of green rocking a newborn in her arms. She kept a watchful eye on her other child, whose curly locks of golden hair, and precocious giggle, reminded me of a young Shirley Temple. Her daughter, who must have been four, was lost in a world of magic—chasing fairies, dancing, and talking to leprechauns—or so I imagined.
I watched this enchanted child dance to the rhythm of the day as flecks of shimmered sunshine pierced the luscious emerald canopy—the golden hues fluttering about her like translucent butterflies.
Twirling barefoot in a sea of daisies, her yellow sundress took on the shape of a flower as she began to sing—accompanied only by a robin’s song.
“Buttercup, Buttercup, I love you. Buttercup, Buttercup, do you love me too. Buttercup, Buttercup, it’s time to wake up. Buttercup, Buttercup…”
Soothed by the lullaby melody, the scent of lilacs and early morning tulips, I leaned against an ancient oak and turned to my favorite Thoreau poem, Mist, and read.
“Low-anchored cloud,
Newfoundland air,
Fountain-head and source of rivers,
Dew-cloth, dream-drapery,
And napkin spread by fays;
Drifting meadow of the air,
Where bloom the daisied banks and violets,
And in whose fenny labyrinth
The bittern booms and heron wades;
Spirit of lakes and seas and rivers,
Bear only perfumes and the scent
Of healing herbs to just men’s fields!”
The spell cast on me by the day was broken when I heard the mother call, “Buttercup—Buttercup, it’s time to go.”
I looked up from my page into the sparking blue eyes of innocence now standing before me—a bouquet of daises in hand.
“Hello little one,” I said. “Is your name Buttercup?”
“That’s what everyone calls me,” she said with a giggle in her voice. “What’s your name?”
“Everyone calls me Terry.”
“Terry, these are for you.” And she thrust the bouquet of daises into my hand.
“What are these for?” I asked a bit perplexed.
“They’re for you silly.”
I let out a laugh. “No-no-no honey, I mean why are you giving them to me?”
Buttercup smiled a child’s toothless smile and said, “Because you’re here.”
“Thank you very much, Buttercup.”
“You’re most welcome,” she said with the voice of an angel. “Bye.”
“Bye Buttercup.”
As she ran back toward her mother, I took in the intoxicating aroma of kindness, and a warm tear trickled down my cheek. It was the first time in my life anyone had ever acknowledged my existence with a gift for no other reason than I was here.
I had come to the park to find a bit of inspiration in a poem, and instead I found it in the heart of a child.
Terry Elkins (whyguy)
Terry,
It’s a lovely lyrical essay. Regarding markets for it, pick up this month’s writer’s digest magazine–it has a whole section on essays.
Also, check out the web site for the “chicken soup for the soul” anthologies–they’re always soliciting stories, and they like essays, especially the short-and-sweet variety like this.
Good luck!
Jessica
Hi Terry
This work is very good and you have refined it well. Given your audience, I fully agree with your decision to reintroduce the zoo elements.
Just two typos – there are two references to “daises” when they should be “daisies” – your spell check would have accepted it as it is the plural of “dais”. I am sure the little girl could not lift a platform (or two)! (sorry for levity, the image popped in my head).
Good luck to you!
Gerry
Thanks Gerry, I’ll make those changes straight away. I appreciate this more than you know, you honor me with you knowledge, and your keen eye to detail. I’ve found a couple of places that look promising for submission purposes, now I’ve got to figure out how to right a query letter. I may need your help, since this would be my first try and submitting anything.
You’re the best. Thanks again.
Terry
Gerry, thanks for your keen eye on the typo, you kept me from looking like a fool. And no, I don’t think she could lift that platform. LOL
Great story, Terry, and it really got lots of reaction, didn’t it? As writers, we’re always trying so hard to get our work in front of people. Thank goodness there are places like #fridayflash where short stories can get the attention they deserve.
I love the point of the story. As a mom, I can sure attest to the inspiration that flows to me from my younger family members. Their efforts especially– they strive so hard to get approval from the time they can talk.
As we become adults, we sometimes forget hor important it is to give and get that acknowledgement. There really is no better feeling than being appreciated just for “being there”.
Keep up the good work, Terry. I’ll be sure to check back.
Best regards,
Donna
Thanks Donna, I appreciate you stopping by and leaving your comment. I didn’t know their was a “fridayflash”, but I’ll check it out. You and your husband are amazing writers, and I look forward to reading more of your work. I hope you stop back often, as a writer it’s nice to know that others are reading your work.
You’re definitely a writer at heart, aren’t you? It shows.
I think Gerry’s suggestions were solid, although you probably have more of a background in descriptive writing than I do. I come from years of journalism, where we toss out adverbs and adjectives with abandon!
Having said that, I think you’ve got the meat of a really good story. It was definitely touching, and has a theme that would appeal to many. Good luck with Chicken Soup. That would be awesome!
Thanks Sue, this story is one of my favorites, and I too think with a few minor adjustments this piece could be better. Gerry has been a tremendous help to me, as you have, and I thank you both.
Hi Terry
This story moved me. I think in part because I have a four year old daughter who I call “Sweetie”, but it can be substituted for any number of other choice words that mean the same as “Buttercup”. When I read your about your tears, it was nearly welling in my eyes. Having said this, it isn’t just my good fortune with having a young daughter that I was moved by your story – the art of storytelling and good writing is to convey those slices of life and waken the dormant emotions in all of us. You did it very, very well.
As a would-be writer, may I make a couple of technical comments and raise a question? (Yes, rhetorical, as I am doing it – but i will refrain beyond this if you are uncomfortable).
Your descriptions in the first few paragraphs are extremely vivid and illustrate the joyousness of the day and the motivation for your journey to the zoo. I wonder if the descriptions of the sunlight etc, as well as the girl’s hair etc, might have been a little excessive – with the emphasis on “little” by the way. I ask you to ask yourself that question, as my style tends to be a little briefer in that area and I could be biased.
I think the dialogue with the child and the way you tied it all together at the end is the strongest part of your story. A lot of information gets conveyed indirectly by way of what is essentially simple and brief sentences. We all strive for this element of our craft.
I hope I haven’t breached decorum here – and besides, I think your story is excellent. I ask you to be as honest with my work at all times if you choose to read any of my stories.
Thanks for allowing me to read your work!
Gerry, I thank you for your feed back from the bottom of my heart, I can not hope to become a better writer without positive feedback, as well as a bit of criticism. Brevity has never been my strong suit, and I admit I sometime over do it with the description. I will rethink this piece, and see where I can make it better by incorporating your suggestions, if you have specific ideas for me it would be much appreciated. Please, feel free to be as open and honest with me about my writing at all time. With your help I may yet become the writer I dream to be.
Thanks again for your support Gerry.
I am no authority, Kevin – but I genuinely believe that the best way to improve as an author is to interact with other authors, openly and honestly.
To slightly expand on my earlier critique, I have to emphasize that we need to be mindful of individual style. I love description, but I work very hard (and tend that way anyway) to let the nouns blossom in the reader’s mind eye rather than add too many adjectives, for instance. When I polish I particularly make the judgement call with regard to descriptors. Now, on the other hand, I have read wonderful works by other authors where they do in fact employ more adjectives and adverbs, adjectival and adverbial phrases, etc, and it works, and is praised.
I look forward to reading your other stories.
regards
Gerry
Gerry, I hope to contact you by email to pick your brain on this a little further. I agree, each writer has a unique style, however, I’m open to learning as much as I can from you without taking advantage of your good nature and willingness to help me become a better writer. I haven’t been writing description very long, and I think this piece was one of my first attempts of description, and to be honest I only did 2 drafts of this piece. With your guidance I hope to make it better.
Thanks Gerry
An elderly woman, for whom I have much respect and admiration told me to start with Reader’s Digest. So, I’ll pass that information on to you. Though it may seem like a somewhat antiquated approach these days considering the high-tech world we live in, I have found wisdom in the words of my elders. Best of luck to you on this wondrous journey!
Oh… I was responding to the “any suggestions?” about submissions…. sorry…
Thank you for the suggestion, and your support. : )
What a lovely story, Terry. That reminded me of many years ago as a young child the whole hold the buttercup under your chin, but I can’t quite remember what it was supposed to about ~ can you? or anyone here? When the yellow reflected on you chin it was supposed to prove something, but what that something is, I can’t remember.
Of course you’re going to be published, Terry. There’s no doubt about that. You’re quite a gifted writer! Love ya.
Oh, by the way, I’d love an email about atkins diet ~ details, details ~ I want details. {{~_ä}}Pamela
The buttercup under the chin means your in love. I think. LOL
I’ll get that info to you as soon as I can Pamela. Thanks for the words of encouragement. Love ya back. Terry
This is beautiful. Great Job, I hope you get this published somewhere.
Terry, I see in you this wonder child. What a gift you have received. I just know that you will be published. Thank you for sharing this. I believe that each of us has a “buttercup” living in us. A wonder child.
Tears of gratitude for you,
Patee
Thanks Patee, keep your fingers crossed, and say a prayer for me. I need all the good vibes I can get. I believe, I believe, I believe…..
Outgrow his Nana? impossible!! I still adore mine and let’s just say i am definitely not a child anymore.
This was beautiful! I think that you can paint a picture with words better than anyone I have ever read! The descriptive words you use are great and have gotten better even in the short time I have been reading your work, and were great to start! It is good to see your different ways of writing various stories too, but all with the same signature.
I will be dreaming about being in that park by the end of the day today, I was for a second reading this.
I think it’s great. How is your class going for you? I noticed it’s almost over? That was quick!
Thank you for your kind words Lindsay. I’m glad you enjoyed the story. My class is over, and I’ve already signed up for my next one on descriptive writing. I keep practicing in hopes of getting better.
Oh, I wanted to let you know I’ve sent this story off in hopes of getting it published. I sent it to Chicken Soup for The Soul. So keep your fingers crossed for me.
Terry (whyguy)
That was really beautiful Terry.
What a very precious story that was.I have tears in my eyes.The precious innocent love of a child is one of God’s greatest treasures.I adore my little man and I kinow he loves me,for now ;too soon he will outgrow his nana and sweet kisses and hugs and rocks and pretty leaves and dandylion flowers will be in my stash of favorite memories. I really like your story’s.One of these day’s soon you will be a published author! I just know it. Sincerely jwilson
Joyce, a child will never outgrow his nana, the relationship will change, but it will blossom like a sunflower and grow, and grow, and grow…..
I’m glad you enjoyed this story Joyce. I hope your prediction is right, that I will one day become a published author. I’m working hard at learning the craft. I’m thinking of submitting this one for publication somewhere, but I don’t know where. Any suggestions?